If you have recently gone through a divorce, you may have been dreading this holiday season. However, now that the holidays are here you have the opportunity to make the best of them.

Instead of longing for past traditions or feeling bitterness towards an ex, you can focus your energy on creating new holiday traditions that your whole family can enjoy.

Recently, a human behavior, parenting and education expert shared some tips on how to do this in an article for the Huffington Post.

First, though, the family expert said that it’s important to remember that you must step up your parenting game during the first few holidays after a divorce in order to show your children that you are there for unending love and support.

Now, here are some tips for creating new holiday traditions to go along with your new family dynamic:

Meet with your ex to discuss a holiday parenting plan. Once the plan is set and you know when the children will be with you, you can start coming up with ideas for specific traditions.

Ask for your children’s input on creating new holiday traditions. Your children might be more excited about new traditions if they get to help create them.

Spend one-on-one time with each child during the holidays. It’s important for each child to feel loved and supported as they adjust to the changed family dynamic.

Give each child an important holiday “job” that they can be responsible for. This can help the child feel important and excited about his or her new role during the holidays.

Include others in your new holiday traditions. The holidays can feel a bit lonely post-divorce, which is why it might be a good idea to add extended family members, friends or neighbors to your plans.

Source: The Huffington Post, “Starting New Holiday Traditions After a Divorce,” Dr. Gail Gross, Nov. 26, 2014